That subtle nagging that you can't escape, yes, you know what I'm talking about. That small feeling in the pit of your stomach that tells you that "something" isn't quite right. That same thing that after all truths have unfolded you say to yourself..."I JUST KNEW IT."Unfortunately, we don't always find out about the truth until well after all of the lessons have been played out. After all of the pieces of the puzzle come together and you find yourself broken and bruised from being taken advantage of.
When you're in a relationship, romantic or otherwise, and there is something inside that tells you something just isn't right, or, you find that you have trust issues that keep playing over in your head. Often times you dismiss these things as your own paranoid issues. You continue to just dismiss the things that don't sit right with you because you're either worried it's YOU, or you don't want to face what's being plastered right in front of your face.
Let's say your other half is out of town for work. You contact them more then once with no luck. The later it gets, you sit by your phone waiting for it to do something...anything. Finally at 11:30 pm you get that much waited response in a text saying..sorry late dinner, I'm pooped call you in the morning. Ok, eyebrow raises and sirens are going off inside your head like a mad person. Then, after a few moments you say to yourself..hmmm, must have been a really important meeting to last so late. Denying it works for you. It settles those sick butterflies down and you're good again now that you've dismissed it as your own paranoid self esteem issues. Of course, in the meantime you beat yourself up emotionally and mentally that you shouldn't "worry" so much.
Another situation you may find yourself in is that you're in a romantic relationship and the other person tells you how much they love and adore you. How much they want to see you and they miss you so very much. All the while, they go days without calling or weeks without wanting or needing to see you. Once again, you wonder what is it that is wrong with you? Nothing. It's the other persons inability to speak their mind and let you know that they "just aren't that into you".
Now lets address those butterflies in the pit of your stomach. Chances are they are there for a reason. They aren't just random monarchs trying to find their way to the border. This feeling in the pit of your stomach is your inner voice trying to tell you something just isn't right about the situation. It's not going to be some loud booming voice saying..."THEY ARE LYING..WAKE UP". It's normally very subtle. Subtle enough that you can drown it out with your own reasoning to make yourself feel better. Those eery flutters, well it's the same feelings you get when you yourself deceive...so take note the next time that you're not being truthful or you fib of how it feels inside. I bet once you connect the two together, you'll understand exactly what I'm saying.
Sometimes, however, it is in fact your own paranoia. This is when you have to determine between your inner voice and your fears. That isn't always a very easy trick either. Your fears are often very strong and can send your mind into a frantic frenzy of "what if's". That's when you have to watch for the inconsistencies with the other person, or behavior that is out of the norm. When you have outside factors actually showing you and coupled with the inner ickies, you're more then likely being deceived. This is when you have to be truthful with yourself in seeing all of the signs that are being shown to you.
It's taken me a lot of years of real soul searching and learning how to quite my mind to tell the difference between my fears and my inner voice. And, even now, sometimes, my fears get the best of me. When I can't tell the difference, I will wait it out a while. Chances are that there will be outside validation that will either confirm or deny my feelings. More then likely, the person will trip up and be left scrambling to cover their tracks. When that happens it's helps you to distinguish the difference between your fears and your inner voice. At this point, it truly is time to face the truth and the facts being presented. Often times however, by the time this happens, it's too late and we've already been hurt and deceived.
The important thing to learn from any situation where you've been deceived is to become aware and watch for feelings and signs, and don't dismiss them. Remember, people are humans, they lie and fib. But you don't have to be the one on the other end being taken advantage of due to the other persons issues with being truthful.
Need help with learning how to hear your innervoice? Contact me for information on quieting those fears and opening your heart to the truth. http://www.deepawakenings.com/
